Aile i\u00e7i \u015fiddetin \u00e7ocuklar \u00fczerindeki olumsuz etkileri saymakla bitmiyor. Uzman Dr. Can Tumba, \u201c\u015eiddet bula\u015f\u0131c\u0131 bir hastal\u0131kt\u0131r. \u015eiddete tan\u0131k olan k\u0131z \u00e7ocuklar\u0131nda aile i\u00e7i \u015fiddet ve ayr\u0131mc\u0131l\u0131kla birlikte sinsi bir utan\u00e7 duygusu yerle\u015fir, kurban rol\u00fc benimsenir\u201d dedi.<\/p>\n
\u00c7aml\u0131ca Medipol \u00dcniversite Hastanesi \u00c7ocuk ve Ergen Ruh Sa\u011fl\u0131\u011f\u0131 ve Hastal\u0131klar\u0131 Uzman\u0131 Dr. Can Tumba, en g\u00fcvenli liman olan ailede ya\u015fanan \u015fiddetin \u00e7ocuklar \u00fczerindeki y\u0131k\u0131c\u0131 etkisinin boyutuna dikkat \u00e7ekti. Dr. Can Tumba, \u201cAile i\u00e7i \u015fiddet \u00e7ocuklar\u0131 t\u0131pk\u0131 bula\u015f\u0131c\u0131 hastal\u0131k gibi etkiliyor\u201d bilgisini verdi.<\/p>\n
Aile i\u00e7i \u015fiddette sadece fiziksel bask\u0131n\u0131n de\u011fil, duygusal, sosyal ya da ekonomik m\u00fcdahalenin bulundu\u011funu ifade eden Tumba yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131 yaz\u0131l\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131klamada aile i\u00e7i \u015fiddetin, dayak yiyen, s\u00f6m\u00fcr\u00fclen, utanca bo\u011fulan, korkuyla sinen yeti\u015fkinler ve \u00e7ocuklar anlam\u0131na geldi\u011fini belirterek, \u201cAile i\u00e7i \u015fiddet, ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 korku ve utan\u00e7 nedeniyle \u015fiddetin her t\u00fcr\u00fcn\u00fc sineye \u00e7eken; \u00e7ekmedi\u011finde ya\u015fama hakk\u0131 elinden al\u0131nan kad\u0131nlar demektir. Anneleri veya ba\u015fka yak\u0131nlar\u0131 g\u00f6zlerinin \u00f6n\u00fcnde katledilen \u00e7ocuklar demektir. Bu a\u00e7\u0131dan aile i\u00e7i \u015fiddeti \u2018kad\u0131na y\u00f6nelik \u015fiddet\u2019 veya \u2018erkek \u015fiddeti\u2019 gibi cinsiyet\u00e7i tan\u0131mlar\u0131n i\u00e7ine yerle\u015ftirmek, bu vahim meselenin dar kal\u0131plar i\u00e7inde \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcmlenmeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131lmas\u0131 riskini beraberinde getirir. Genel kan\u0131 do\u011frultusunda aile i\u00e7i \u015fiddetin daha \u00e7ok yeti\u015fkinler aras\u0131nda ya\u015fand\u0131\u011f\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fclse de ger\u00e7ek durum \u00e7ok farkl\u0131d\u0131r\u201d dedi.<\/p>\n
\u201cD\u00fcn\u00fcn ma\u011fduru bug\u00fcn\u00fcn faili\u201d<\/p>\n
\u015eiddetin bula\u015f\u0131c\u0131 bir hastal\u0131k misali kolayca sirayet ederek aile bireyleri aras\u0131nda h\u0131zla yayg\u0131nla\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131na dikkati \u00e7eken Tumba, \u201c\u0130ster yeti\u015fkin ister \u00e7ocuk olsun \u015fiddete maruz kalan insan yani \u2018ma\u011fdur\u2019, g\u00fcn gelir \u015fiddetin \u2018faili\u2019 olur. Mazlum rol\u00fcnden zalim rol\u00fcne giden yol h\u0131zla a\u015f\u0131l\u0131r. Kimin g\u00fcc\u00fc kime yeterse sistemiyle ma\u011fdur ve zalim kolayca birbirine kar\u0131\u015f\u0131r. Klasik \u00f6rnekte oldu\u011fu gibi erkek kad\u0131na, kad\u0131n \u00e7ocu\u011funa, \u00e7ocuk karde\u015fine, okuldaki arkada\u015f\u0131na, hi\u00e7 kimseyi bulamazsa sokaktaki hayvana \u015fiddet uygular. Aile i\u00e7inde \u015fiddetin ya\u015fand\u0131\u011f\u0131 evlerde, bu \u00e7arp\u0131k sistem i\u00e7inde ister k\u0131z ister erkek olsun \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n ya do\u011frudan ya da tan\u0131k olarak maruz kalmas\u0131, \u00f6nce \u015fiddetin ma\u011fduru sonras\u0131nda \u015fiddetin faili olduklar\u0131 g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc kapatamayaca\u011f\u0131m\u0131z bir ger\u00e7ek\u201d ifadelerini kulland\u0131.<\/p>\n
\u201cTemelinde cinsiyetler aras\u0131 hiyerar\u015fi var\u201d<\/p>\n
\u015eiddeti cinsiyetler aras\u0131 bir hiyerar\u015finin sonucu oldu\u011funa i\u015faret eden Tumba, \u201cAile i\u00e7i \u015fiddet bebe\u011finden ya\u015fl\u0131s\u0131na, do\u011fulusundan bat\u0131l\u0131s\u0131na, k\u00f6yl\u00fcs\u00fcnden kentlisine, dar gelirlisinden varl\u0131kl\u0131s\u0131na, okuma yazmas\u0131 olmayan\u0131ndan \u00fcst d\u00fczey e\u011fitimlisine, sosyal, ekonomik, k\u00fclt\u00fcrel farkl\u0131l\u0131klar\u0131 i\u00e7eren t\u00fcm ko\u015fullarda ya\u015fan\u0131yor. Bu y\u00fczden aile i\u00e7i \u015fiddet \u00e7ok boyutlu toplumsal bir sorun. Temelinde kat\u0131 s\u0131n\u0131rlarla tan\u0131mlanan toplumsal cinsiyet rollerine, \u00e7ifte standarda, ayr\u0131mc\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 destekleyen veya ho\u015f g\u00f6ren tutumlara, \u015fiddeti \u00e7at\u0131\u015fma \u00e7\u00f6zmek i\u00e7in ara\u00e7 kabul eden zihniyete dayan\u0131yor. Ayr\u0131ca nesiller aras\u0131n\u0131n yan\u0131 s\u0131ra cinsiyetler aras\u0131 hiyerar\u015fiyi benimseyen zihinsel ve k\u00fclt\u00fcrel bir yap\u0131n\u0131n sonucu. Durmaks\u0131z\u0131n kanayan bir toplumsal yara. Aile i\u00e7i \u015fiddet vakalar\u0131nda ilk s\u0131ray\u0131 fiziksel \u015fiddet al\u0131rken bunu duygusal ve s\u0131ras\u0131yla ekonomik ya da cinsel \u015fiddet izliyor\u201d diye konu\u015ftu.<\/p>\n
\u201cTravman\u0131n faturas\u0131 a\u011f\u0131rd\u0131r, bitmez\u201d<\/p>\n
Tumba, yeti\u015fkinler aras\u0131nda ya\u015fanan aile i\u00e7i \u015fiddetin faturas\u0131n\u0131n b\u00fcy\u00fck \u00f6l\u00e7\u00fcde \u00e7ocuklara kesildi\u011fini belirterek \u015funlar\u0131 anlatt\u0131: \u201c\u00c7ocuk, sorumlulu\u011fu kendisine ait olmayan bir su\u00e7un cezas\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7ekmek zorunda kal\u0131r. Hatay\u0131 ebeveynler yapar bedelini \u00e7ocuklar \u00f6der. Oysa \u00e7ocuk; \u00f6zel bir durumu ve ayr\u0131cal\u0131klar\u0131 olan, geli\u015fimini s\u00fcrd\u00fcren insan yavrusudur. \u00c7ocuk, yeti\u015fkinlerin istedikleri \u015fekilde yo\u011furabilecekleri canl\u0131 bir hamur olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131 gibi, yeti\u015fkin insan\u0131n k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fclt\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f \u00f6rne\u011fi de\u011fil. Geli\u015fimi s\u0131ras\u0131nda ebeveynleri taraf\u0131ndan bak\u0131lmas\u0131, kollanmas\u0131, korunmas\u0131 ve desteklenmesi gerekir. \u00c7ocuklar bedensel travmalara kar\u015f\u0131 dayan\u0131ks\u0131z olduklar\u0131 gibi duygusal travmalara kar\u015f\u0131 da son derece hassast\u0131r. \u00c7ocuklar \u0131slak \u00e7imentoya benzetilir, \u00fczerlerine d\u00fc\u015fen k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck veya b\u00fcy\u00fck her \u015feyin izi kal\u0131r.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cKi\u015filik geli\u015fimi hasara u\u011fruyor\u201d<\/p>\n
Davran\u0131\u015f bozukluklar\u0131 olan \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n ili\u015fkileri kurarken gerginlik ve \u00e7at\u0131\u015fma y\u00fckl\u00fc oldu\u011funu s\u00f6yleyen Tumba, \u201cZira \u00e7ocuk ruhsal s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131s\u0131n\u0131, ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 utanc\u0131 ve \u00f6fkeyi \u00e7evresine yans\u0131t\u0131r. Duygusal semptomlar\u0131 yo\u011fun \u00e7ocuklar ili\u015fkilerinde g\u00fcvensiz ve \u00e7ekingen tutum sergiler. Bu t\u00fcr \u00e7ocuklarda h\u0131r\u00e7\u0131nl\u0131k, kavgac\u0131l\u0131k, ge\u00e7imsizlik, okuldan ka\u00e7ma, kural ihlal etme, otoriteyle \u00e7at\u0131\u015fma, alt\u0131n\u0131 \u0131slatma, yalan s\u00f6yleme, su\u00e7a y\u00f6nelik davran\u0131\u015flar, organik nedeni olmayan b\u00fcy\u00fcme gecikmeleri, korkular, kayg\u0131lar, tak\u0131nt\u0131lar, uyku sorunlar\u0131, yetersizlik, de\u011fersizlik duygular\u0131, parmak emme, uyum sorunlar\u0131, al\u0131nganl\u0131k, kendine zarar vermeye y\u00f6nelik davran\u0131\u015flar, intihar d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnceleri ve giri\u015fimleri g\u00f6r\u00fclebilir. Ki\u015filik geli\u015fimi a\u00e7\u0131s\u0131ndan kritik d\u00f6nemlerde aile i\u00e7i \u015fiddetin ma\u011fduru ya da tan\u0131\u011f\u0131 olmak geli\u015fen ki\u015filik yap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 derinden etkiler, onar\u0131lmas\u0131 g\u00fc\u00e7 veya imkans\u0131z hasarlar olu\u015fturabilir\u201d dedi.<\/p>\n
\u201cBa\u011f\u0131ml\u0131 ve sald\u0131rgan nesil\u201d<\/p>\n
Tumba, k\u0131z ve erkek \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n ebeveynleriyle \u00f6zde\u015fim kurduklar\u0131 i\u00e7in aile i\u00e7i \u015fiddetten etkilenme bi\u00e7imlerinin de farkl\u0131 oldu\u011funa dikkati \u00e7ekerek \u015fu de\u011ferlendirmede bulundu: \u201cK\u0131z \u00e7ocukta aile i\u00e7i \u015fiddet ve ayr\u0131mc\u0131l\u0131kla birlikte sinsi bir utan\u00e7 duygusu yerle\u015fir. Maruz kal\u0131nan haks\u0131z muamele, s\u00f6ylenen k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr\u00fcc\u00fc, onur k\u0131r\u0131c\u0131 s\u00f6zler, gereksiz bask\u0131lar, aile \u015ferefinin ta\u015f\u0131y\u0131c\u0131s\u0131 rol\u00fc ile bu utanc\u0131 besledi\u011fi i\u00e7in k\u0131z \u00e7ocuk kendisini de\u011fersiz ve yetersiz hisseder. Utan\u00e7 ve e\u015flik eden korku \u00f6\u011frenilmi\u015f \u00e7aresizlikle sonu\u00e7lan\u0131r. Kurban rol\u00fcn\u00fc giderek benimser, ileri ki ya\u015fam\u0131nda i\u00e7inde \u015fiddeti bar\u0131nd\u0131ran ili\u015fkilerin i\u00e7inde olma ihtimali artar. Genellikle anne kurban, baba sald\u0131rgan oldu\u011fu i\u00e7in k\u0131z \u00e7ocukta erkeklere kar\u015f\u0131 \u00f6fke olu\u015fur. \u0130fade edilemeyen ve bast\u0131r\u0131lan bu \u00f6fke sonucunda ise edilgen, ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131, kendine yetmeyen, \u00f6zg\u00fcvenden yoksun, s\u00fcrekli di\u011ferlerine ihtiya\u00e7 duyan \u00e7ekingen bir ki\u015filik yap\u0131s\u0131 bi\u00e7imlenmeye ba\u015flar. Geli\u015fim s\u00fcrecindeki erkek \u00e7ocuk ise bu d\u00f6nemde hayat\u0131na \u015fiddeti yerle\u015ftirmi\u015f bir erkek modeliyle \u00f6zde\u015fim kurar ve \u015fiddet yolundan y\u00fcr\u00fcmeye ba\u015flar. Bu yolun bir di\u011fer ka\u00e7\u0131n\u0131lmaz sonucu, kad\u0131nlar\u0131n de\u011fersiz, \u00f6nemsiz oldu\u011funa dair duygu ve d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelere sahip olmakt\u0131r\u201d \u015feklinde konu\u015ftu.<\/p>\n
\u201cKaybedenler ordusu\u201d<\/p>\n
\u00c7ocuklar\u0131n en temel hakk\u0131 olan aile kavram\u0131ndan yoksun b\u0131rak\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131na i\u015faret eden Tumba, s\u00f6zlerini \u015f\u00f6yle tamamlad\u0131: \u201cG\u00fcvenli, d\u00fczenli, sevgi ve ba\u011fl\u0131l\u0131kla temellenen, zihinsel, duygusal, bedensel ihtiya\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131 kar\u015f\u0131layan bir aile ortam\u0131ndan yoksun b\u0131rak\u0131lan \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n ya\u015fad\u0131klar\u0131 bo\u015fluklar kolayca doldurulamayabilir. Gelecek y\u0131llarda toplumda \u2018kaybedecek hi\u00e7bir \u015feyi olmayan\u2019 yeti\u015fkinler ordusu olu\u015fabilir. Aile ortam\u0131, i\u00e7inde hem hayat\u0131n hem de insan ili\u015fkilerinin sergilendi\u011fi sahneye benzer. \u00c7ocuklar ise \u00f6n koltuklarda oturup olup biten her \u015feyi izler. \u0130\u00e7inde \u015fiddetin kol gezdi\u011fi ailelerde \u00e7ocuklar kavgay\u0131, hakareti, sald\u0131rganl\u0131\u011f\u0131, hak ihlalini \u00f6nce \u00f6\u011frenir sonra uygular. Hem ruh sa\u011fl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n hem de ruhsal hastal\u0131klar\u0131n temeli, bebeklik d\u00f6neminden itibaren at\u0131l\u0131r.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A\u0130LE \u0130\u00c7\u0130 \u015e\u0130DDET\u0130N \u00c7OCUKLAR \u00dcZER\u0130NDEK\u0130 OLUMSUZ ETK\u0130LER\u0130 SAYMAKLA B\u0130TM\u0130YOR. UZMAN DR. CAN TUMBA, \u201c\u015e\u0130DDET BULA\u015eICI B\u0130R HASTALIKTIR. \u015e\u0130DDETE TANIK OLAN KIZ \u00c7OCUKLARINDA A\u0130LE \u0130\u00c7\u0130 \u015e\u0130DDET VE AYRIMCILIKLA B\u0130RL\u0130KTE S\u0130NS\u0130 B\u0130R UTAN\u00c7 DUYGUSU YERLE\u015e\u0130R, KURBAN ROL\u00dc BEN\u0130MSEN\u0130R\u201d DED\u0130.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":202099,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[2296,3014,50915,139,10288,2759],"class_list":["post-202098","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-genel","tag-siddet","tag-aile","tag-bulasicidir","tag-cocuklari","tag-etkiler","tag-ici"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.tvturk.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/aile-ici-siddet-bulasicidir-cocuklari-da-etkiler_dd2a5d9.jpg?fit=684%2C550","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/paKIfm-QzE","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.tvturk.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/202098","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.tvturk.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.tvturk.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.tvturk.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.tvturk.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=202098"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.tvturk.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/202098\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.tvturk.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/202099"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.tvturk.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=202098"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.tvturk.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=202098"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.tvturk.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=202098"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}